A Musical
I wrote this a long time ago. Sadly, this had 6 parts. I think I lost the others since they were previously posted in Themestream.com, a wonderful site that closed shop. Hopefully someone out there has copies of the next few portions and can send me a copy back.

JESUS DeuX: A Musical

ACT ONE: REINCARNATION
A group of scientists appear under a great operating table light. The
scene is nearly angelic in atmosphere, with emergency room curtains hanging
like angel wings at the side. With a great rumble of thunder, the
scientific breakthrough begins.

SCIENTIST A
I see, yes I see
In its base simplicity
the secrets hidden beneath flesh and blood and gene.
Can it be this easy
to tread between obscenity
and miracle and life?

SCIENTIST B
I grin as I begin
This act of scientific sin
to bring life from a long forgotten stain.
Could this dried sanguinary
be genesis to erroneous catastrophe
or the coming of a second Jesus Christ?

SCIENTIST C
I check, I inspect
every drop, every fleck
and determine which seeds to be weaned.
Shall this be Nobel worthy
or a small act of divinity
its too late to step back now and doubt.

SCIENTISTS
It begins, this revelation
of success and condemnation
as we take from the old the vital codes.
From the myth and reflection
we attempt ressurection
using science as a determining road.

Embark with us on this journey
to discover, learn and worry
and recreate the path that God has taken once before.
With the art of Genetics
and inspired creative pyretics
Let us be the ones to personally welcome God.

(Lights swirl, the operation begins and the cloning has been successful)

SCIENTIST A
Did we triumph, did it work

SCIENTIST B
Don't delay, or is it nay?

SCIENTIST C
Give me time, let me check if it is done.

SCIENTISTS
The tension rises like thunder
though our hearts race with wonder
if the fushion of God and Man was true.
Calmness consumes all of worry
and our fear, we begin to bury
as we see the Messiah come to view.

It had worked, victorious moment!
We have mixed the right components
and have raised from the dead the living God.

SCIENTIST A
May I be Joseph?

SCIENTIST B
And me the Mary

SCIENTIST C
My friends, it is time to be wary
for the experiment has only just begun.

SCIENTISTS
But we cannot deny what we see with our eyes
The Messiah has come thanks to our hands.
No more worry of condemnation, we achieved resolution
and our names will be known through out the lands.

We are famous, we are rich
(without either virgin or bitch)
And we will be remembered for time for what we have done.
Let us see if he remembers

SCIENTIST B
Though I wonder more of his gender

SCIENTISTS
But for sure, the Second Coming has begun!

One more poem
Jose Cuervo Especial was once a favorite drink of mine. I would down sixteen shots in a party and still be able to commute the long trip home.

But I did have my bad days.

And in one occasion, I was so mashed that I couldn't even stand upright and shuffle to the bed. My friends had to strip me naked, give me a bath and toss me into my bed in my boxers.

Ah, the perils of drinking.
And life.

Lick.shoot.suck

Cuervo captures the intricacies of my life
In three words.

He spoke to me
Sensuous salted songs
That set me thristing for more of lips.

Then had me swallow
Bedlam bittered bullshit
Of how, what and why I'm not good enough for him.

Now,
My life sucks.

And the sour tang remains in my mouth
Still.

A Palindrome
Palindromes are words that can be read forwards and backwards. A Palindrome poem uses the same idea.
Hope you find the meaning behind the poem.


Visions of Death and Resurrection
(Palindrome 1)

Red
Rum
flesh

Tar
Water

A
back
Coming
is
Sign

I
mock
cabaret

a
Wrath

Self
Murder

METROSEXUAL MEN
No, they aren't men who love sleeping with trains.
They're more interesting than that.
I wonder if I'm becoming one?
Thanks to Rico for the heads up on this article

Fun stuff
Found these at the bodega of an Evil Slave.
Thanks Dex! Hehehehe...


I am TOBIE! The Technician Optimized for Battle and Intensive Exploration

Here' something for you Dungeons and Dragons people.

And

for the voyeur in all of us.
Daily Confessions
Don't tell! Just share.

A Matrix moment
Why does the Oracle's conversation with Seraph focus more on what Agent Smith is doing than what Neo is doing when she talks about "The One" and she throws in the line - "The One will be guided by The Many." Could it be Agent Smith is actually THE ONE and Neo is THE MANY? Of course, Agent Smith being THE MANY is easier to consider since that's literally what he can become.. but what if THE MANY refers to Neo having numerous personifications already?

Are you my friend?
Sige nga, if you are. Click here. I look forward to seeing you there. Best regards.

Yes, I am part of Captain Planet!

Which [5 Elements] are you?

On hindsight, wala nga palang Wood sa Captain Planet

Before Night Falls
Okay, for those who have NOT heard of this movie.
Trailer is here.
A review is here.
Its another amazing film that I highly recommend. The movie transforms the memoirs of gay Cuban writer Reinaldo Arenas into a movie that is both moving, inspiring and down right amazing. Considering the movie was done by Julian Schnabel (known for his trippy heart-wrenching Basquiat) I had high expectations for this film. And I must say those expectations were surpassed. My only gripe? The wonderful parts in Spanish which I wish had subtitles. But even without understanding the lines, the music of the language keeps the movie going. I'm sure though my experience with the film is a huge factor below what they'd hope I'd experience due to language barriers.
The movie stars Javier Bardem, Johnny Depp, Sean Penn, Vito Maria Schnabel and Olivier Martinez.
See it if you can find it!

Someone out there be nice and get me this
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS – EXTENDED EDITION
review taken from Ain't It Cool News
Johnny Bartlett here, taking a break from the 9 to 5 (got me a total of 217 thats more than Shipman!) to bring you a look at the Exended Edition of The Two Towers. You know that feeling when theres a movie you fuckin' love and youve seen it over and over, only after a while you start thinking Wouldnt it be cool if this time there was something different in there, just to surprise me? Or perhaps thats just me. Anyway, Im inclined to think Peter Jackson understands this well: like last years extended edition of The Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers: Extended Edition is a treasure trove for fans of the film - there's so much new stuff spread throughout that it really is like revisiting a beloved classic and finding it to be twice the experience you remembered. I wont bother reviewing the movie we heard it all late last year, right? but at 3 and 3/4 hours, The Two Towers now has an epic running time to match its scope, so if ya hated it last time, you'll hate it even more now. Effects in the added scenes are of equal quality to those of the theatrical footage (and I caught this one in a crew screening a few weeks back, so is was based on seeing it on the big screen) despite many of these shots having been completed just for the DVD. Your arse'll be so numb youll think it up and died on ya and your bladder filled to bursting, but if you loved The Two Towers, youll also be oblivious to the pain and grinning like an idiot. Spoilers? Fuck, yeah:

- Extended opening, in which the hobbits scale a cliff face using the rope Galadriel gave Sam, including a better build-up to the arrival of Gollum.

- More friction between the Uruk-Hai and the Orcs as they transport Merry and Pippin back to Isengard, which better sets up the fight over food that takes place later.

- More scenes of Saruman breeding his army, creating better pacing as the invasion of Rohan begins

- Terrific scene in which Eomer finds the body of Theodred, Theodens son.

- Additional scenes with Merry and Pippin, including extensions to existing Treebeard scenes and the Ent Draught sequence, in which the hobbits grow. In another scene, Treebeards soporific poetry works its magic.

- Theodreds funeral scene, with Eowyn singing a lament.

- A wonderful introduction to Aragorns horse Brego, who we learn was Theodreds horse. Aragorn requests Brego be set free, which places his later rescue in better context.

- Additional scenes between Eowyn and Aragorn, including one in which he attempts to eat a bowl of evil-looking stew.

- More scenes between Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli, which expand upon the films politics (including the union between the two towers Gandalf scene from the trailer, though that line is missing from what I can remember).

- More of Sarumans musings, setting up themes that will be explored in The Return of the King.

- Flashback to the circumstances surrounding Boromir being sent to Rivendell for the Council of Elrond, taking place during the re-taking of Osgiliath by the Gondorian army. This sequence briefly introduces John Noble as Denethor, a major character in The Return of the King. I was worried this sequence would seem like an indulgence, but its difficult to imagine the film without it; not only is the character of Faramir, much maligned by fans of the book, given added depth, so too is Boromir enriched by this addition.

- Just before the Ents storming of Isengard, the Huorns mobilise and leave to attend to business elsewhere; they reappear at Helms Deep to kill the Uruk-Hai as they flee.

- New ending, with Merry and Pippin finding a larder at Isengard, including two barrels of pipe-weed; a hilarious scene in which Gimli and Legolas compare their scores after the battle of Helms Deep; Frodo, Sam and Gollum are shown the way out of Osgiliath by Faramir, who threatens Gollum; theres even a brief moment in which Sam and Gollum appear to make peace.

- Along with all these major additions, many more scenes are subtly extended to give more information or reinforce themes already present.

SPOILERS END.........................................................
In all, its as much a treat for fans of The Two Towers as last years extended edition was to those of The Fellowship of the Ring if not more so, and despite the number of times Ive seen The Two Towers, I cant wait to see the Extended Edition again.



IIIIIIIII WANT THISSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Depression
I'm suffering from that right now.

I decided to watch You Got Mail today after having a terribly stressful day hoping to ease the burdens and pains of being a cog in the machine known as ABS-CBN Global Ltd. After laughing with Tom Hanks and having my heart strings twisted with Meg Ryan, I found myself suffering from a terribly confusing bout of happiness and depression.

I tell you, it was horrible. I didn't know whether I was smiling or crying at each second that passed.

I believe in Love, you see.
I believe in the idealistic, poetic, romantic and pathetic description of Love.

I believe in a Love that sweeps you of your feet, tickles your toes, kisses you softly and whispers to you at night that you are happy, loved and accepted wholly. Totally. Absolutely. And that any thing that isn't good for you is eased away. And the best of you shines out so bright that those around you cannot help but be flooded by the Love you are in.

But I also believe in reality.
And in the truth that love needs compromise. Love needs rules. Love has limits.
And that Love alone cannot keep you alive.

There was a time not too long ago that someone tore my heart out, chewed it and squeezed it so hard til I realised idealistic love isn't real. That person ripped away my "belief in such illusions." That person made me realise that I was "wasting my time believing in such love." Of course, after a slew of mistakes from both ends, we ended up living separate lives. And sadly, not even remaining as friends.

But now, I realise I do still believe in Love.
And I am thankful that I didn't end up with someone who thinks any romantic notion of how Love should be isn't real unless it conforms to that person's personal dictates on how it should be.

I am happy.
And I am depressed.

And right now, I can't help but wish my computer would suddenly surprise me and say, You Got Mail.

Again, the coup
I only hope that the price of raising their thoughts is not the further fall of our country's attempts to rise from the ashes of its economic slump.

There-in lies the question isn't it?

Do we save our economy and rebuild our country even with its shadows, cobwebs and demons within?
Or damn it to ashes to cleanse it from within, and hope we can still stand up someday before its too late?

Something different

Janice looked over her shoulder and noticed the small trail of smoke that lazily danced towards the ceiling. Following the impudent trail of wisps down to its source, Janice struggled not to raise her voice when she noticed the lit cigarette sitting on top of the ceramic bowl that she used as an incense holder.

"Frank," Janice sighed audibly as she walked towards the cigarette, "How many times did I have to tell you to-"

Janice froze. She realised the lit cigarette has a red smear around its filter. Lipstick. Her lipstick. Glancing across the living room with a quick glance, Janice surveyed the room for any sign of her boyfriend. Somewhere in the apartment, she could hear him grunting frustratedly; His voice was too muffled by both distance and thick walls to be decipherable. Reaching down, Janice picked the cigarette up and brought it close to her face. It was her lipstick. Or at least, it was the same brand. But the thing was, Janice didn't smoke.

A thud, muffled yet undeniably present, came from the room beyond.

While carefully considering her options, Janice crushed the lit cigarette against the ceramic bowl. There was definitely someone in the room. Someone who wore the same lipstick as she did and liked to smoke. And that someone was definitely not Frank. Did she really want to know who was inside the bedroom with her boyfriend? Did she really have it in her to confront him and demand an explanation? Was she strong enough to deal with this and leave with her self-respect and esteem intact.

A soft laugh murmured from the same direction. It was a woman's voice.

She imagined hundreds of women.

Tall ones. Blondes. Curvy Latin women with huge smiles and beaming eyes. Sultry Asian women with mysterious eyes and lips that seemed to entice you into strange and exotic taboos. She imagined the clothes the woman must have been wearing. Beige perhaps. The color did go well with the lipstick. Or maybe a crimson shawl over a gray power dress. A business woman. An executive. Frank's boss.

Janice shook her head.

Maddy was ten years Frank's senior. Unlike most women, Maddy was the type of woman with features that seemed to have been chiseled on. Rough, sharp angles formed her features. Midnight hair crowned her head. She always wore her mascara too thick. Janice used to tease Frank that if she were any younger, she'd be a slut.

Frank would tease back that she was an old spinstress.

Was she?

Janice felt her chest heave and grow heavy. A tightness wrapped around her. She found it hard to breathe. Her trembling hands toppled over the ceramic bowl. Watching the ashes scatter over the table, Janice found herself looking at the opaque glass littered with the white ashes. She remembered the beautiful night Frank asked her to live with him in his small yet homely apartment. It wasn't much, he explained, but it was theirs. And Janice stared at the grandeur of the night and realised all the stars were witness to his request. She said yes.

But now the stars were nothing but ashes.
And the crushed cigarette with lipstick fell to the ground.

Janice had left the apartment without a word.

* * *

"I'm really sorry you weren't able to speak with her," Frank apologised as he held the door open with his free hand. The elderly woman leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. With a smile, she stepped out the door and checked her purse for anything she may had left behind. Snapping it shut, the eldery woman looked up at Frank with a worried eyes, "Oh dear. I left a lit cigarette in the-"

"No problem," Frank assured her although it was clear he too seemed a tad confused, "I can see it from here. Its dead. You must have crushed it earlier."

"Yes," the eldery woman nodded and slipped her hat on, "I guess I forgot." Looking over Frank's shoulder, the elderly woman saw the table and gave a slight pout, "Pardon the mess. Must be my arthritis."

"Again, not a problem," Frank assured her and gave her a kiss on her cheek. Holding her hands tightly in his, he stared into her eyes and smiled a long and meaningful smile. Somewhere behind it, though, was a slight tinge of regret. "I guess you better be going. Again, I really wish you had a chance to speak with Janice. I'm sure she'd love to hear the news. Not to mention, she'd love to see you liked the lipstick she gave you."

"Well it does add a touch of color to my grumpy old face, doesn't it?" the elderly woman pulled her hands back and gave a cheerful wave, "Just tell my daughter that yes, I would not mind it if you did propose to her. I must admit, its a surprise to me that you'd ask me first."

"Oh I don't know," Frank gave a gleeful smirk, "I guess with everyone proposing before telling their parents about it, I wanted Janice to have something different. Something special. Thanks again for coming Mom.. ah, can I call you mom?"

"Of course," the elderly woman replied, "Why, I have no idea why Janice would not say yes. No idea at all."

The End of the World of Darkness is Here
Atlanta, GA; July 26, 2003 -- After 12 years of buildup, White Wolf Publishing is bringing its award-winning World of Darkness to a climactic end in an unprecedented series of game supplements and tie-in novels. This is the Time of Judgment.

At a special announcement today, held as part of the Gen Con Game Fair in Indianapolis, IN, White Wolf Publishing brought the exciting and cataclysmic news to its fans and the entertainment community at large. Over the first three months of 2004, the Time of Judgment will unfold and bring a finale to the entire World of Darkness and its trademark games -- Vampire: The Masquerade®, Werewolf: The Apocalypse™, Mage: The Ascension®, Hunter: The Reckoning®, Demon: The Fallen™, Changeling: The Dreaming™, Mummy: The Resurrection™ and Kindred of the East™.

I am going to love reading through these. I'd love to see what direction they take it.

And again, we all suffer...
Another coup d'etat has begun here in Manila.
Its a shame really. I don't really know what's worse:
a) The fact that our country has to suffer through these radical changes almost once every two to three years just to remind everyone that the corruption, creative stagnation and politicking has not helped the country
b) The fact that nothing really changes afterwards anyway.

As usual everyone has their list of usual suspects behind this.
As usual everyone has their own views on how it can be best dealt with.
As usual our economic slump is taking an ever lower nose-dive thanks to all this.
As usual the rich get richer, the poor get poorer and the middle class get caught in the middle feeling responsible and apathetic at the same time.

When I checked my blog online, there was a slightly pathetic attempt at being rude poster on my tag-board. Before I could even realise the insult was intended to frustrate me, I found myself recalling the current situation of the country. And you know what, that guy who posted is a great example of what's happening here.

You got people who think they know you and love to say things about you without realising that their words are actually more than worse. Their words are things that can be misunderstood to be truth, or misinterpreted to be an attack. When deep down, for all you know, the words could be intended as an attempt to open your eyes and help you become something better.

Or, like what I'm doing now, they could be weapons intended to hurt, and we're just too much of a fucking martyr to realise it.

Before heading for bed

Indifference
You look at me
with dead eyes that shine
darkly
light night and midnight sandwiched between
dusk.

You look at me
without malice, or fear,
or anger,
or pain
regardless of past transgressions
or carried crosses.

You look at me
without smiling,
or recognition,
as if the face you once
adored
had been replaced with clear glass.

You look at me
and look past me
as if I was never
there.

And I look at you
wishing
somehow,
someway,
I was
actually "looking back".

- July 2003

Band wagon joining moment
This quiz has pretty much been on everyone else's blogs. I might as well take a stab at it and see how horrible I am.


You are the horniest of the horny. You want ass,
and you want it now. Lookout world, because
you are on a mission.


How Horny are YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla


I will admit the results did not surprise me one bit. I claim First Amendment Rights to not explain the results other than that this is a good demonstration of how being single for a year affects a person. On a side note: at least I'm definitely healthy.


Kikoman... uh...

THIS was fuckin' frightening.
I tell you it was. Its just as bad as F4.

Digital Quilt
Another bandwagon-joining moment. There's this not so original idea going on of a digital quilt.
Decided to join in. Hey, at least its added assurance I'm remembered somehow even if i die young.

Too bad I don't have a place to post my entry so you can see it here. Just have to download it at http://www.geocities.com/tobito_abad/digitalquilt_tobie.jpg
to get a glimpse. But frankly, don't bother. It ain't much.

Oi! Guess what I found!
I guess the world does stink eh?

Click here if you dare.
And here's a sad example of what this is all about.



AND THEY MAKE MONEY OUT OF THIS!
ARgh.. the world is cruel. Smelly and cruel.

Mind controlled machines!
Taken from Yahoo News!

Scientists developing mind-controlled wheelchair
Wed Jul 23,10:13 PM ET

LONDON (Reuters) - Swiss and Spanish scientists are developing a mind-controlled wheelchair that could one day give severely paralysed patients new independence.

The system will use electrodes embedded in a skullcap worn by the patient to transmit messages from the brain to a computer which passes them on to the chair through a wireless link.

"Early trials using a robot indicate that with just two days' training it is as easy to control the robot with the human mind as it is manually," New Scientist magazine said on Wednesday.

The system has been designed by Jose Millan of the Dalle Molle Institute for Perceptual Artificial Intelligence in Martigny, Switzerland, scientists at the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology in Lausanne and the Centre for Biomedical Engineering Research in Barcelona.

The scientists are testing the system with a simple, wheeled robot using commands to turn left, right or go forward. It also includes in-built intelligence to ensure the robot does not collide with anything.

"The team is now trying to increase the number of mental states that its system can recognise," the magazine added.

If all goes well, Millan believes it will be the first mind-controlled system able to operate something as complicated as a wheelchair.

Okay! Visions of Macross Plus moments are starting to come to the fore. Mentally controlled machines! I wonder when I can will my cellphone to dial a friend's number. Whooot!

Japanese Music
Found out an office mate of mine actually listens to Japanese music. Currently, listening to IMAI MIKI, from 1986, and will be checking out a host of others (Hiromi Go, Teresa Teng, and some album entitled Pax Musica) So far, am pretty much enjoying the melodies of Imai Miki. A pity the album doesn't have her picture.

Wait, checking online...
Here,

Tag-Board dead it seems
Ain't working. Can't leave comments on other people's blogs.
Today seems to be a day of miscommunication.

I dunno.
Maybe its just me.

I received e-mail today from a mailing list. A friend of mine lost his long-time caretaker last Tueday. Well, actually he isn't just a friend. He was someone very important and special to me. And somewhere along the line of life, things didn't work out and fell apart. There was a lot of pain, a lot of smiles, a lot of happy memories, fond moments and still burning scars. But all that reasons why things were not working out as friends and whathaveyous seemed to just unexpectedly fade away when I read his mail.

The caretaker (rather not mention her name since I don't really think I have such a right) took care of him and his 4 brothers, sister and even his mom during the long years of life. She was annoying at times. Frustrating even. I recall so clearly those times I'd be on the phone talking to my friend when she'd come into the background yelling at him to either have dinner, take a shower or some strange demand or request which I'd barely quite catch.

She didn't like me. She didn't appreciate my company.
Or my friendship with my friend.

Well, considering now that the contact and communication between me and my friend have all but practically ceased to exist, I guess she'd be happy. I don't really know.

All I know is, all of the sudden I found myself wishing I could reach him. Call him. Talk to him and ask personally if he's okay. Hear his voice and read from the tremble of his words if he is coping well. I tried sending an e-mail to him privately, but I don't know if he still receives my e-mail. I tried calling his cellphone in the past. Invited him to my birthday too, last April. Nothing.

I guess I'm not a part of his life at all any more.
Not as a friend. Or an acquaintance. Or as a part of his past.

I guess that's just how I have to really start to see it. But it is not easy. Not easy to throw away all those years and pretend they never were. I guess there really is some point in one's life when you cross a certain boundary and before you know it, you can never ever truly be friends again.

Its strange.
Today. This day that word of his care-taker's passing has reached me.
This day is also the day I finally realise that I have been dead in his eyes.

And damn, it hurts.

Hmmm....
Taken from the New York Post
July 22, 2003 -- DEMI Moore is accustomed to the attentions of men - but not an over-sexed porpoise. Moore, her beau Ashton Kutcher, ex-hubby Bruce Willis and kids Talluleh, Scout and Rumer were all in Las Vegas to catch the Duran Duran show at the Hard Rock Hotel's venue, the Joint. Sunday morning, the crew went to see Siegfried & Roy's Secret Garden & Dolphin Habitat, and took a swim with the flippery mammals. "Dolphins are very sexually aggressive, and one went after Demi in a big way," laughed our spy. Moore had to get out of the pool.


Well, what can I say? I wish I was a Dolphin.

Pitching is done!
Whew! Pitched my show concept to the big bosses and well.. I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens next. It was such an experience. Almost as tense as a thesis defense. Almost as frightening as a first date. Almost as anxiety-inducing as, well, waiting for news in a hospital hallway on whether or not your pregnant wife is giving birth.

The panel was not as focused as I hoped. Actually, they seemed to be preoccupied with small discussions among themselves. Although a person from the organizing committee whispered to me that they actually were listening and tend to share thoughts during the presentation, they believe I did good. I guess that will just have to be something I'll know for certain in due time.

But that's that: I have sold an idea to the corporation. Whether it will net me a few bucks, a new byline or nothing at all remains to be seen.

But hey, at least I did try, eh?

Interested parties may email me for a copy of my pitch. Obviously, I'll consider each request, but make no promises of sharing it with everyone who asks.

Size matters not, hmm..
http://www.sizehimup.co.uk/
Must admit, its a cool way to advertise.
Didn't realise I was that high up the scale.
Spooky.

Net Trouble
Annoyingly, it was near impossible to get online last night. With the rain thrashing like a drunken whore and the electricity more fickle than a cat's tail, I could not get online to check my mail, blog a bit, or even surf just for the heck of it. Terribly terribly frustrating, I admit. Almost to the point that I wanted to bust my monitor for showing me failure.

I dunno. I guess all the stress at work makes me think in Mortal Combat imagery.

Pitching Day is Here
At around 2:30pm, I shall be facing the three head honchos of my company, as well as the Program managers appropriate to my pitch and deliver what would be the beginning (or the pathetic end) of a possible show in ABS-CBN. Currently, my biggest problem isn't pulling it off, or getting the presentation done. Its actually deciding what to wear. A polo? A t-shirt like I normally do at work (Thank God for work without uniforms. I like the sense of individuality you can place in each day) A barong?

First impressions count a lot in a pitch. Especially when you're hoping the idea would sell against the nth number of other ideas presented that same day.

But I guess I should just keep in mind, its the pitch I'm selling, not my ability to present. Its the idea. Not me.
With that, I guess I'm good as gold.

Yabang ba?
Hehhehehe

Late at Work!
Last month, I had a record-breaking total tardiness equal to 2.1 HOURS.
Egad, I guess I've been slacking eh? On hindsight I do recall those horrible traffic days and the other days that I just can't seem to get out of bed soon enough having worked overtime the night before.

Well, its no excuse I guess. Gotta kick my butt into motion.

Today's Frustration
What the fuck is with all these people who allow themselves to be taken by the surge of hype? Gosh, everything from the new cellphone models, Ragnarok Online, stupid fashion statements and F4... it seems some people just don't have what it takes to truly see the bigger picture.

There are a lot of things out there made with just as much if not even more hard work and effort who don't get the benefits of hype who suffer each time this happens. There are a lot of wasted hours and broken promises that emerge when hype is permitted to take over.

"Why make a fuss? Having fun isn't an obligation."

No it isn't, but neither is letting others trample over your efforts and time just because they want to join the fucking bandwagon.

I'm not saying don't do what you want. I'm not saying ignore F4. I'm not saying Ragnarok Online doesn't deserve being checked out. Or played. I'm not saying any of those things surging in hype are a waste of time. I'm not even making any attempt to pretend alternatives to hyped products are better.

I'm simply saying riding the hype has consequences.
And sad but true, you can't really trust your friends to realise their blind embrace of hype can hurt those close to them.

Hype sucks.
Its a great disguised fucking means to test your patience and bonds between friends.
And I see mine have been tested well.

Hmm...
The following is an article featured in the Philippine Daily Inquirer
of July 18, 2003.

STUDY: FREQUENT MASTURBATION CUTS CANCER RISK
Sydney - Frequent masturbation may be really good for you. Research by Australia's Cancer Council Victoria found that the more often men ejaculte between the ages of 20 and 50, the less likely they are to suffer the disease that kills more than half a million men each year. The survey of 1,079 prostate cancer patients and 1,259 healthy men found that those who masturbated or had sex at least once a day in their 20s were a third less likely to develop the malady.
"For men in their 50s of course that's often not achievable," Graham Giles, who led the research team, said on Thursday. "(But) masturbation isn't bad for you. I don't believe in the blindness and hairy palms thery. Prohibitions against ejaculation are not based on science," he said.
The study conducted between 1994 and 1998 but still being analyzed, did not focus specifically on masturbation. Neverthelss, it was the largest so far to ask participants not just about their sexual relations but also about masturbation, and to analyze the answers.
Giles said the findings correlate with previous research that showed that Roman Catholic priests were 30 percent more likely to get prostate
cancer, but they contradict other studies that suggested having a variety of partners or frequent sex could lift the risk. One theory that could explain the new results is that semen may have a carcinogenic effect on the cells lining the prostatic ducts if not flushed regularly out of the pipes by ejaculations.
The research is due to be published in this weekend's British Journal of Urology International.

So does this mean any one who gives head is a smoker too?

Quiz Happy moment inspired by A

For Fun
you have for urself a pure thug...damn they are the
best!


What kind of Boy friend do you need?
brought to you by Quizilla

Spooky. Hehehehe Very spooky.


For Chopsticks

SPIRIT is your chinese symbol!


What Chinese Symbol Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'm a Crouching Garapata, Hidden Louse


For Costumes


You are...drumroll please...Jonothan Starsmore aka
Chamber, everyone's (well, mine) favorite
Generation X kid and as of lately X men! Born
and reared in London, he is cursed by his
frightening apperance-he has no lower jaw or
chest-the result of the first manifestation of
his mutant ability, when telekinetic energy
literally exploded out of his chest. So
naturally the boy is depressed and withdrawn,
but also a sensative and hopeless romantic.
Jono used to be a musician and heartthrob, so
keep that in mind as well.


What Marvel Comics Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Coolness. I wonder when my chest and lower face would burst away too.


ITS AN OCTOPUS!
snipped short full article here
SAN DIEGO -- The look of Doctor Octopus in the Spider-Man sequel was debuted in a big way on Saturday at Comic-Con International, with a reveal of the character in poster and clip format, as well as an appearance by actor Alfred Molina.

An overflow crowd of nearly 5,000 attended Sony's presentation on Saturday, which included Underworld and Hellboy before finishing up with Spider-Man 2.

I CAN'T WAIT!!!


Lastly, he's finally online too!
Welcome to the world of blogging!
Masarap kumain ng dinuguan!
Here's Mr. I don't read blogs

Thank GOD I am healthy
Just read this article today: http://in.news.yahoo.com/030624/43/25eim.html so trust me when I say THANK YOU GOD FOR GIVING ME GOOD HEALTH!

Here's a snippet of that article:
Kolkata, June 24 (IANS) A 13-year-old boy whose bizarre ailment has a fly-like insect emerging out of him is far from being cured as doctors struggle to detect the source of the parasite.

The fully-grown flies, as doctors described the parasites, have been emerging out of Chandan Goswami's genitals and flying off for more than two weeks now.

Oh gosh.. I do hope this isn't causing the poor boy extreme pain or anything like that. Its frightening to imagine the ordeal he could be having.

Gaming Goodies
Had a great RPG session playing Exalted last weekend. The players were tossed twists and numerous odds and thankfully only one of them had their characters nearly become a casualty. I dunno. I guess deep inside I ain't really willing to risk ruining the plot by letting my players' characters end up dead. I mean, really, if a movie like Starwars had Luke, Leia and Han Solo end up dead in the first part of the trilogy, would you really care about what happens next even if the succeeding movies feature new characters?

The emotional investment my players have placed on their characters is actually becoming a meta-gaming reason to keep their characters alive. I guess to put it simply, Play an interesting character who actually does have both a personality and a life, and you'll stay in the game alive to see the story end.

Money blues...
Saw two neat books today in a bookstore. One was about scientific trivia which you'd love to just read for the heck of it (like how to actually make an egg's shell plastic enough to squeeze into a tube, then back to brittle enough to shatter when dropped) and the other was a nice collection of views as to why people (like myself) are simply enthralled with the idea of the supernatural and the strange. Then there was a few other books I wanted to sink my brain-teeth into.

But bah, with only fifty-bucks to my name til the next pay day, well, I guess I can go diet-reading for a while longer.

Pitching worries
Need to submit a new WORD and SLIDESHOW to my office before the night is done. Pitching day for new show concepts is on the 23rd and I have to admit, though i have no worries of winging it and making it work out during the pitch itself, the need to submit requirements such as the written form and the slideshow aren't really quirking my enthusiasm.

I'm wondering if I should post my pitch here. There was no mention of any Non-Disclosure Agreement anyhow, so I guess its safe to do so? And would it at least be proof that I though of that show idea?

Hmm..

Realisation
There are still some people whom I hate:
And I hate them because they still believe they never did anything wrong.

Carlo Vergara and Zsa Zsa takes new heights!
taken from Carl's blog
The big decision that I recently made is summarized thus: I have awarded the film rights of Ang Kagila-gilalas na Pakikipagsapalaran ni Zsazsa Zaturnnah to Regal Films.
It was a big decision for me because it wasn't only Regal who expressed interest in Zaturnnah's first adventure. In opportunities like these which ordinary mortals like me seldom come close to, I had to exercise a lot of scrutiny and objectivity over it. I'm no longer concerned whether or not I made the right decision; what's important to me now is that the deal has opened new doors, and hopefully it will also open doors for my fellow grafictionists.

Yahoo!!!! I can't wait to see it on the big screen. Here's to hoping that the movie actually goes pretty well!
Carlo Vergara, my most sincere congratulations!

Strange Requests
Its strange but I guess there's no harm in complying.
Just received a request to have two blogs that were listed on my site removed from my links.
I guess some people do see blogs as private areas in the net, even if they're located in a public domain. And not protected from access by any passwords and the like. Its a tad chuck full of irony, and in a way, slightly amusing.

Or maybe I'm just out of touch with the way the net flows and don't really realise that private blogs are normal.

My apologies to you both; Nikka and Paul.
I removed the links.
Hope everything is okay.

Its nearly 10p.m.
And horror of horros I am still at work.
My stomach has been acting up again. I think the amoebas inside are starting to revolt. They are demanding food, coke and the occasional cigarette! Sigh.

Work load has risen to an all time high! And what's even worse is that the same project that you'd be told to rush to meet a deadline is the same project they'd suddenly place on hold the SAME FUCKING DAY! I don't really know anymore how my work is supposed to be approached. I used to love these challenges. I used to love the multi-faceted expectations of actually serving clients in North America, Middle East and Europe in one single day.

Now, frankly,
IT JUST SUCKS WORKING HERE

I dunno if my recent bouts of sickness and fatigue are actual sickness or stress.
Companies should have a section on their regulations on stress. Employees should be permitted to get compensation for such internal and emotional damage, damn it!

Sigh.

Weekend worries
My weekend plans are shot. I dunno what's going to happen. On one hand, I want to start MODELS and get character creation started. But on the other hand, I want to hold my usual Exalted game with T.R.O.P.A. (The Roleplayers Of Paranaque Area) since one of our members feared lost to the "world of Call center odd hours" is actually coming back safe and sound.

Then there's the Kult game I really REALLY wanted to try.
Sigh.

Ragnarok Online SUCKS
Really. It does.
It looked good. The packaging was sound.
But honestly, any game where you need to learn to fucking sit down needs psychological help. Its as stupid an idea as White Wolf Gaming Studio's RPG for Street Fighter (the video game) where something as fucking simple as jumping ALSO needs a skill. Honestly, how many people skilled enough to fight are totally inept in the area of jumping. God, even a handicapped person can hop. Or limp.

Ragnarok Online really sucked. Graphics were wonderful and had a touch of Final Fantasy Tactics, but the interface was clunkier than playing a Real-Time Strategy game like Starcraft on a console (which trust me was a horrible experience already).

And the laaaaaaag.
It was click - wait for a minute - character suddenly moves with the speed of a cheetah to the last clicked point, repeat ad infinitum.

Here's to hoping they fix the bugs and come out with a better one someday.

Added new links here.
Old friends. Past buddies.
And a hopeful link to a blog that doesn't exist yet.

Vienna Teng, Walking hour
Found this CD during a search for something empathic and very angsty at the same time. Well, I discovered Vienna Teng. Like a mix between Tori Amos and Sarah Mclachlan, with a touch of Dido and occasional Alanis... The songs are a mix of piano, percussions at times and the occasional strings.
When you got lyics like:
"I need not to need
or else a love with intuition
someone who reaches out to my weakness
and won't let go
I need not to need
I've always been the tower
but now I feel like I'm the flower
trying to bloom in snow."
-from "The Tower"

Lots of meaning and wonderful moments sung with an honest voice and an easy to follow melody.
Vienna Teng. A new artist to look out for.

For a sample, check out this link but keep in mind this was an earlier rendition of a song that eventually becomes the source of inspiration for two songs on her album.

Enjoy!

A decade and one/decade and one/
I said out loud
A decade and one/and I am here/
I am here still standing
- from "decade and one"

Realizations
Been chatting with two friends (Rico and A) and let me say this:
To whoever once said to me, "Tobie, you don't make friends. you just easily fool them so you can gain their trust and use them" I don't care anymore. I don't care if you were right or wrong. I don't care if its real or not. You have no right to try and tell me what you think I am or what I do when all you cared about was yourself and finding ways of hurting me. I know I was everything you could never be and I know that deep down inside you wished I could be less I am because it was the only way you could feel better about yourself.
Well, HA!
That's never going to happen.
I may have depressed moments,
but it never means I believe the words you say.

And to all the crap I have to wade through in work, let me say this:
You aren't paying me what I am worth. And you'll never be able to pay me what I am worth.
You're lucky I choose to work with you. And you should be aware of how lucky you are.
Treat me wrong, and I can leave. I might need the money to survive in the world,
but you don't hold any power over me.
I can earn my keep in other places.
And I can choose to leave when I want.

Now, I feel better.
Thanks guys!

Your Ultimate Purity Score Is...
Category	Your Score	Average
Self-Lovin'	13.3% I wouldn't shake hands, if I were you	64.6%
Shamelessness	38.1% Puts 'em on the glass	79%
Sex Drive	15.8% Humps fire hydrants when nobody's looking	77.3%
Straightness	0% Knows the other body type like a map	44.4%
Gayness	0% Makes Dr. Frank-n-Furter look tame	82.8%
Fucking Sick	61.1% Dipped into depravity	89.6%
You are 26.34% pure Average Score: 72.2%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test and see how you match up!

Okay, now I am scared of myself.

Honestly Depressed
Okay, I shall say this without a doubt: Dancer in the Dark is a depressing film. When I finally found the courage to complete the movie, I just found myself heavy-hearted and tremendously struggling not to hate the world. One truth I have discovered in my so far 26 years of life is that any movie based on some real-world setting isn’t too far off from being an actual experience or event that is happening somewhere in the world. And I guess Dancer in the Dark counts under the category of “Somewhere out there, someone is dying for a crime she never did commit.”

Ah, Bjork.. you have scarred me.

Flooding in the Flat
I returned to my apartment this Sunday to discover something I do not want ever to happen again. The rains of Saturday and Sunday converged upon me in an act of malice: My apartment was flooded in.

Thankfully, though the water spread half-way across the living room, it missed all major appliances, and failed to truly destroy all my personal affects that were inside old balikbayan boxes (after all I have yet to buy all the shelves and polyboxes I need for my stuff). It consumed the floor tiles and finally exited via the bathroom and its ever reliable drain.

Let me tell you this: Never trust a weekend that has rain welcoming your moment of waking.

Exalted Card Game

When the fad of Collectible Card Games swept the nation, and every other teen was searching for their Black Vise, I was happily playing a game called Jyhad. Based on a roleplaying game called Vampire: The Masquerade by White Wolf Gaming Studios, I was content to see if my opponents could out-wit me politically, or find ways around my Trap-inspired combats.

Recently, the same gaming company developed an anime inspired high-fantasy game called Exalted. In the game, you play humans who have been chosen by the Gods to defeat their enemies, and eventually find yourselves in an Age when mortal men seek your heroism and yet fear your destructive capacities. It is a great game and I am still enjoying playing it.

Recent news announced that the same company plans to release a Card Game based on Exalted. If the game is anything an innovative and fun as the Jyhad game (now known as Vampire: The Eternal Struggle) then I can’t WAIT to try it.

I just hope it doesn’t come out as hard to find and play as the rest of them CCGs.

Hmm...

Perhaps there is something in the world that makes it world exploring a tad more often.
I dunno. Call me strange, call me queer, call me boring, call me a user, an artist, a fluke, a mother-fucking bastard who doesn't know what love is and what friendship really means, call me pathetic, call me pure, call me clinically psychotic with a capacity for self-destruction.

All I know is I do what I want to do.
And I do it without killing anyone else.
Back at'cha!

Two articles that attest the world is filled with idiots
NEW YORK (Reuters) - A U.S. comic book publisher has decided to let Princess Diana rest in peace, dropping plans to reincarnate her as a mutant comic superhero this fall, the company said on Thursday.
Marvel Enterprises Inc. said in a statement that "upon reflection" it will remove Diana and all references to the royal family in its upcoming "X-Statix" monthly comics.
The about-face follows a recent announcement by Marvel Comics that it planned to introduce Diana as one of a team of super-powered mutants in a five-series storyline called "Di Another Day."
Company spokespeople were not immediately available to elaborate on the decision.
Diana was to have been a character in a satirical look at fame and pop culture, Marvel said earlier this week.
Buckingham Palace called the idea "utterly appalling" and a "cheap attempt to cash in on Diana's fame and the tragic circumstances surrounding her death."
Idiots I say. Idiots.

July 11, 2003 -- 'I'M NOT being a braggadocio or anything like that - but you know you're on top when they start throwing arrows at you. Even Jesus was crucified. People who bring light into the world, from Mahatma Gandhi to Martin Luther King to Jesus Christ, even myself."
One guess as to who said the above? You got it - Michael Jackson. Jackson was Q&A-ing music producer Pharrell Williams for Interview magazine, but, natch, the singer had to get his "Poor Pitiful Me" bit into the mix. (Memo to the other celebs - don't let Michael Jackson interview you. It'll end up like this.)
Michael goes on about "the devil in people," how he "loves all races" and but of course how "jealous" everybody is. But, "I'm resilient. I have rhinoceros skin. Nothing can hurt me. Nothing." (Michael has some interesting things to say about music before he sideswipes into the Christ analogies.)
Michael also says "God bless you" a lot. Nobody's sneezing, but he likes to say it anyway.
Someone please develop a Kill-Stupid-People bomb please.

Pitched...
Okay, sacrificed part of my creativity and pitched a show idea to my office. Here's to hoping it leads to something more substantial than Intellectual Theft. Well, one can't achieve anything without risk-taking eh?

Diliman
New site seems to be functioning well, but surprisingly not a peep of response on what the ninth issue is like for its readers.
I wonder, do they know the issue is up? Maybe I should shut down the old geocities site and point all traffic here instead?
Hmm..

Brown-Outs
I hate it when the power dies out. The heat. The claustrophobic darkness. Ah.. it wouldn't be so bad if I had a partner to snuggle up to and.. well, make use of the darkness with but.. life's like that sometimes I guess. On other times, its just plain cruel.

From Yahoo News
Black-Widow Spiders May Improve Sex Life - Chileans
Wed Jul 9, 3:43 PM ET
By Patrick Nixon
TEMUCO, Chile (Reuters) - Chilean researchers said on Wednesday they aimed to develop a new pill to combat impotence that would have the added bonus of being a male contraceptive, based on experiments with the venom of black-widow spiders.

The spider, famed for the female's tendency to eat her mate after sex, makes a poison that can produce muscular seizure, acceleration of the heart and even death.

The scientists, working at University La Frontera in the southern Chilean city of Temuco, have been studying the effects of the venom's various properties for the past seven years. By isolating these elements, they could reproduce them synthetically in drugs to strengthen weak hearts and help men with erectile dysfunction.

Last November, they discovered by accident that one ingredient in spider venom could not only facilitate male erection in a way similar to the popular Viagra pill, but also render sperm infertile.

"This new drug could help the functioning of the male erection without having to worry about the partner getting pregnant," Fernando Romero, director of the research project, told Reuters outside his lab filled with the dangerous spiders caught in southern Chile.

The feared black widow has earned its place in Chilean folklore. A womanizer is said to have been "bitten by a spider."

Romero said the contraceptive effects of the drug could last up to 20 minutes, depending on the dosage.

Romero and his team have won funding of $970,000 from the government and the university for three years of research, which they hope will end with a drug patent. Brazilian (news - web sites) experts and Chilean pharmaceutical company Laboratorio Silesia are also involved in the project.

Romero said they were aiming to eventually produce a drug that would have a similar effect as Viagra but without any potentially harmful side-effects such as an accelerated heart rate. He said they would isolate and eliminate the agents in the venom affecting the heart.

Viagra works by blocking an enzyme called PDE-5 that affects blood flow to the penis.

Several Chilean doctors contacted by Reuters were slightly skeptical of the project before seeing scientific results but in general welcomed the research.

"This is a good project with a solid scientific base. I think it is government money well spent," said Raul Vinet, a pharmacolgist from the University of Valparaiso.

I could only wonder how they are:
a) testing this
b) calculating and measuring its effectiveness

On the other hand, makes you wonder if Spider-man can get his pee-pee up. Maybe that's why He can't get it on with Mary Jane Parker... hmm...

Buti pa si Hulk. No need for spider-venom help.

Hmmm...

The HULK is ANGRY!!!
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2003310256,00.html

In more ways than one it seems.
Now if only we can have an Eric Bana figure with the same "features."

Here's a special for you readers out there:
DILIMAN's test-official site is now online
with issue 9.

If the site goes well without any hitches for a month,
I'll proclaim it the new OFFICIAL SITE.

Feedback, broken links and comments,
please email me asap!

Freezing..
To minimize problems with our G4 Macintosh computers, the temperature in our office has been brought down to 22 degrees. I tell you, after five minutes of working, my fingers start feeling numb and cold. Fifteen minutes without a break can lead to much bluer fingers and a slight shiver and tremble.
I'm now an icicle in this working machine.
If only I can find someone who'd lick me like a popsicle.
Or better yet, suck on me like an ice cream cone.

Egad..
Okay I need a breather. My blog turned into some antartic fantasy.
Excuse me..

Hmmm...
Just saw Being John Malkovich and now, I'm not sure if I'm me.
Interesting movie. More of a thriller actually than anything else. Black comedy, and no I don't mean skin-tone.
Found it to be an intriguing movie concept nicely developed and very interestingly executed.
Took me a while to realize it as Cameron Diaz in that movie! Poor John Cusack though... never saw being a puppeteer such a sad profession. Freaky though, his sexual tensions released through puppets...

Diliman issue 9
Its been all done, but until the new official DILIMAN WEBSITE is complete, I can't release it. I dunno... want it to be released at the same time I guess. Targetting this month for both's release.

Nearly Forgotten
Episode 9 has been released. I wonder if anyone has noticed.

Realization
I am turning into a cranky old man. This is scary. I need to be happy more often. Not ha-ha happy. Real happy. Probably should dip my toes back into making nonsensical weird stories and the like. Or maybe run more RPGs more often. Or maybe its a hint I'm ready to run a Demon game.

Yahoo News
Fancy a vomiting hippo ring tone?

LONDON (Reuters) - The sweet birdsong of the nightjar, the roar of a lion or the grunt of a hippo could soon replace the trilling and beeping of mobile phones.

The British Library is offering mobile telephone operators some of its 100,000 recordings of the world's birds and beasts as alternative ring tones.

"Some of the new sounds are lovely, although the hippo does sound rather like someone vomiting," a spokesman at the British Library said on Monday.

The new tones will be only be available on the latest third generation phones following a commercial tie-up between the British Library Sound Archive and iTouch and Mobiletones.

Makes me wish I had a cellphone that could have those types of ringtones. Sadly, my cellphone is still one for the Jurrasic era.

Watched half of Bjork's Dancer in the Dark today.
It got me too depressed to continue it.
Will try again tomorrow.

Rabbit-Proof Fence
Just saw this Phillip Noyce movie adapting the true story of Molly Craig and her sisters...Rabbit-Proof Fence - three aborginal kids who were abducted by the Australian government to be trained into being more "white" and being able to work in a "white household". Not wanting to stay, and desperately wanting to be back with their parents, the three set off on an escape that takes them over 2000 km, walking across the Australian landscape, following the rabbit-proof fence that would lead them home.

The film was amazing. It had an intensity and honesty that definitely has been lacking in many other films. The film makes no attempt to declare one side or the other side wrong, but presents both with a naked willingness to be judged. Emotionally, one sides with the kids, empathic to their plight of wanting to be home and back with their parents... but then one looks at the side of the government, hearing their talk about "Saving the Aborginals from themselves" and find himself both agreeing and yet despising them for what they are doing.

Add the masterful performances of Kenneth Brannagh (playing the man behind the government program) and the three talented newcomers to the film industry, and the amazing score of Peter Gabriel and you just find yourself watching a film that will definitely be remembered.

Hope you guys find a copy to watch.
It's amazing!

Makes me wish there was something I could do to help.

Gwaaah. Office e-mail acting like an antedeluvian's attempts at gaining an erection without the help of Viagra or suction tubes... the frustration of seeing all these unread e-mails is hideously irritating. Something tells me I should just give up and head for lunch soon enough.

Purchased The Body Book: The Geography of the Filipino Body Editted by Maria C, Arriola and illustrated by Onib Olmedo. Its serving as a WONDERFUL source of material and ideas for my locally themed online comics. Have to find more resources like this.

Forced to put Bangungot on hold due to workload issues. Ironically, being unable to read my office e-mails, I might be unable to work. Hmm.. this is starting to be as strange as that time I was working with a friend of mine on a possible local comic way back in my highschool years. We were working on a God-Alien-Science-Evolution-Mecha-Psionics type of science fiction idea. Having meticulously typed over fourteen pages of ideas as well as name concepts and researched material for the book, I was on the verge of saving when zap! the power goes out. "Maybe this ain't so good an idea," I teased Ryan when suddenly the lights came back on. Ryan and I laughed out loud for a few seconds about how the thing happened so perfectly. What's frightening is around a minute or so later, Ryan commented "Shall we get back to making this comic work?" only to have the power die out again and remain out for the rest of the evening.

Sometimes, Diving Intervention doesn't try to hide at all.
And you'd be blind not to get the hint.

LEAN ON ME!
Yay! Dean and his sweetie, Nikki, Carl and I got to videoke tonight!
Whoo!!! The winner for the evening was LEAN ON ME. Grabe, we definitely had a blast singing that song. I admit, I was pathetic in my attempts to sing KAHIT ISANG SAGLIT and though we were tremedously happy to find the place had SEASONS OF LOVE, the version there wasn't just kind to people of our voice range.

Still, ANG SAYA SAYA!!
I'm a happy garapata!

Vinnie and Elbert better join us next time!
:-)

Now, if only I can free my saturdays more often. Heheheh.

Morning groans
I will never understand it.
But yes, it happens. I'm sure it has happened to you at one point or another. You meet someone, you chat a bit, you get to know each other as pretty intersting people. You occasionally bump into each other, exchanging greetings and trading hellos.

Then its gone.
One sudden moment, you're in a queue for breakfast and notice the person a few feet ahead of you. You want to ask the person to join you at your table. You want to ask, "How are things?" and "What's up on your end?"

But instead, you see the person hurriedly find a table, eat breakfast, then hurriedly leave without a hello. And the funny thing is, you know the person noticed you.

I can't help but find myself pondering:
Is the person acting like some child, or am I since I'm letting myself get emotionally rilled up for what the person did?

Such frustrations seem to increase in intensity each passing day. I'm starting to wonder exactly where I stand in all this. Do I have the right to be more assertive, telling the person about what the person made me feel emotionally? Explain how I didn't appreciate suddenly being treated like a shadow? Or are all those actions merely signs that I'm being sensitive?

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh

Diliman blues
Diliman issue 9 is being delayed due to the website delays. For some reason, even if I deleted certain pages from the server, the website keeps showing it. Ayyyyeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm sleepy
I need to sign tonight.
Hope Dean, carl , Elbert and Vinnie can make it.

Rice bowl journals... hmm.. i wonder if they serve Champorado.

Comic Review: David Mack's KABUKI: Circle of Blood TPB

Ever seen those real, gritty, edgy indie films shot in 16mm Black and White film? That's what Kabuki is like: a heartfelt, emotional, charged and edgy piece of fiction that reads more like an autobiographical record of love, despair, vengeance and jealously.

Having first read Skin Deep, my experiences with Kabuki were worlds of color and depth. I was swimming in a technicolor world of watercolors and gradients. And strangely, my favorite scene in the book was when Kabuki spilled the black liquid on the floor and used her hair as a brush to fill the walls with her thoughts and imagination.

Black and white stark against the colored world of the psychiatric ward simply astounded me.

But with Circle of Blood, the edgy black and white tones of the whole story scream at your face so loud that you'll start seeing the color of each panel without it having been shown. Though the dark black of the meeting room where the Noh are gathered is no different from any other black panel in the book, you start seeing the points where black shifts to the yellow of the fire. Where the whiteness of kabuki's face mask merges into the blue of her lines. The red of her lips.

You see color no matter how stark the black and whites are.

And you'll see the color burst forth even richer than today's computer colored masterpieces. Why? Because these black and white characters have soul. Have peronsonality. And because the artist's heart and soul echo so strongly in this work, you'd think he mixed his blood somewhere in with the inks.

Kabuki: Circleof Blood is truly a masterpiece of storytelling. it completes a tale, leaving enough questions to ponder on and hope to have solved in future installments, and yet closed the "circle" of the story to end the chapter in a satistying read.

David Mack, there is no questioning why you're work was noted back then, and why you have ever right to be proud of your achievements.

Thank you once more for sharing your vision with us.
May I earn enough to order the next TPB within the month. I need my next fix :-)

Sincerely, with all due respect and gratitude.

tobie