Thursday, July 28, 2005
A Strong Foundation
When we had our teambuilding seminar a few weeks back, the importance of having a strong foundation was paramount in our discussion. We were all tasked to build towers using plastic straws. All towers were supposed to be at least five feet tall and were supposed to symbolise ABS-CBN. My group and I quickly worked on our tower and came up with one that had the best foundation among all those made: a square base and a lot of good inner links to distribute the stress that it would face. Though we were the second of three groups to finish, we wanted to ensure the strength of our tower as much as possible. When we were told that the towers were to be tested after by having someone from another group fan the tower as strong as possible with a newspaper, we were not worried. We were confident with the way we constructed our tower. True enough, try as they might, the others were unable to topple our tower with their swings.
Having a strong foundation means a lot in many things in life.
Relationships founded on mere physical attraction or sex are doomed to fall apart. Friendships founded merely on the interest on similar things are eventually torn asunder by the next big hobby. Communication with one's parents founded on just problems would lead to arguments and lack of sensitivity to one another. Even weddings, founded on the simple need to "save one's face because of a pregnancy" are very delicate things that if not taken care of, can quickly dissolve into separations.
The problem is not finding a relationship with a strong foundation. Ironically, almost any relationship can be given a foundation to stand on. The true problem is choosing the right foundation to build upon. And this can differ between persons more than one would expect. For some, humor stands as the very firm earth that the long friendship has built upon. For others, its understanding of each others situation that allows the mutual respect to grow and nurture into something far lasting. There are even others who have made the ills of a third party the skeleton of what allows their passion to thrive, and that, though wrong, allows them to keep going as if they have done nothing wrong.
A strong foundation is key to anything meant to last.
And there is only one other thing harder than having to do what it takes to keep a friendship/relationship/partnership going... it is finding the courage to end something which you realise has no fertile ground upon to grow. When you realise there is nothing between you and another that can serve as a good foundation to develop upon... there is sadly no easy way to call things to an end.
But, it must be done.