Sunday, March 14, 2010

What if along the way you find somebody you think you want to be with for the rest of your life and you are committed to somebody else? In your experience (and in this situational situation), how did/would you break up without really hurting him/her?

First of all there is no proper way to "break up without really hurting him/her" I have always been a firm believer that honesty is a vital element in a relationship, as well as a clear display of one's breeding and character.

If the hypothetical situation ever arose, the first thing I would do would be to talk to my current partner and clearly explain the details surrounding the event. I will not conceal the attraction or interest, and I will not try to pass blame around or point fingers as to why the relationship became shaky. I would admit where my feelings lay, and I would ask my partner to consider the existing options with me: Do we break it off mutually? Do we try to make it work and help each other rebuild trust in one another, while at the same time firmly assist each other in keeping the third party out of the picture to give the relationship an honest chance? Perhaps even discuss things to honestly explore why I would ever think the new person would even merit so high so suddenly in my heart and mind.

But I would not two-time.
I would not cheat.
I would not blame my partner for being lacking. Or insensitive. Or claim it was my nature or simply me being me to find interest in another person.

I would embrace my faults. I would admit my role. I would lay out the cards and deal with this with my partner having a voice, an opinion and a right in the matter.

And if I was the one in the situation whose partner thinks I'm not the one who is meant to be, then I would at least expect to be treated the same way above.

It would be honest. And with dignity.

Ask me anything

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