DCU: Ultimate Desire #2

Captive Heart

Glass.

The prison was made of glass. Glass and cold bricks. The floor was of old cold bricks. And chalk.

There were markings on the floor. Arcane symbols and ancient scripts. Glyphs. And iconography. Magic was words and these were words meant to stay forever.

"You did it! You did it!" came a voice that seethed with excitement and success. The source came from someone beyond the confines of the glass prison. "You captured him! You captured hi-"

"Silence!" scolded a second voice. The second voice was far older. Far more wizened with age and perhaps experience.

Candle light flickered in the distance. Smoke gathered in the ceiling. Sweat dripped down nervous faces and across tense cheeks. Amidst the shadows, Roderick Burgess grabbed his shivering hands tighter and tried to hide any hint of worry and fear he had within him. John Hathaway nervously slid closer to the glass cage. He stared through the glass and looked at the figure that was unconsciously lying on the ground within.

Curled up on the ground like a child that was too afraid to look up was an unconscious lithe figure of a man. Or a woman. For the purposes of the narrative, the figure shall be referred to as he, though in truth one would be hard-pressed to truly decide what gender the figure extruded most clearly. Such things, remained it seemed, in the heart’s desire of the beholder. Barely clad in anything other than a gossamer strip of purple cloth, his naked body seemed to glow with an inner light. And an outer sensuality.

Shamefully, Alex Burgess felt a stirring within him. And coyly, he turned away and tried to hide the growing attraction he had for the prisoner. Oh how he hoped none of his father’s friends had noticed the evident physical signs of his interest.

But even as the room filled with the contained cheers of the people who had taken part in the ritual, Roderick Burgess shook his head and began yelling at those present to quiet down. John Hathaway, still standing at the glass’ horizon, nearly pressed his face against the glass. The urge to see the prisoner better was nearly overwhelming his sense of self preservation. Only Roderick’s perceptiveness kept John Hathaway from accidentally stepping upon the very runes that made the glass prison a magically sound one.

“You’ve done it,” John Hathaway mumbled beneath his breath; his eyes never left the prisoner, “You’re imprisoned Death.”

“No, not Death,” Roderick Burgess admitted, “This isn’t-”

“We caught Death and now we can demand that Edmund be brought back!”

“We caught someone else!” Roderick Burgess screamed and the whole room turned to face him. Alex Burgess found the opportunity to slip out of the room and quickly made to leave when something at the corner of his gaze caught his attentions. Turning towards the figure on the floor, he noticed something golden barely concealed beneath one foot. Roderick Burgess grabbed his hair and turned to the rest of the room, “This is.. This is one of the others… One of the others…”

“A demon?” John Hathaway worried inquired.

“No,” Roderick Burgess motioned to his followers to lift the glass cage. Alex Burgess saw an opportunity to see the golden thing better and maneuvered towards the glass to be closer to it. With a collective heave, the followers of the self-proclaimed Daemon King tugged on the ropes that were tied to the top of the glass prison’s elaborate rim. The cage slowly lifted, inch by precarious inch, until there was enough space for an adult to walk inside. John Hathaway recoiled in worry, fearing that the reclined figure would suddenly spring up to escape. Roderick Burgess snorted in annoyance and called for one of the followers to bring closer a light. Alex took the chance and stepped inside as well.

He was beautiful. Achingly beautiful. Alex stared at the figure and unconsciously felt himself stiffen in arousal. He bit on his lower lip, then forced his gaze away from the naked form of the summoned prisoner and focused on the glimpsed golden thing by its foot. It was a small metal thing. In the shape of a heart.

“She’s… she must be some kind of angel,” John Hathaway gasped aloud, seeing the perfect curvature of his neck. The plump lips seemed ripe for kissing. And the chest; his ample bosom seemed to call to him.

“Do not let the prisoner distract you,” Roderick Burgess warned Hathaway, “The Endless are not to be trifled with. This is not Death. This is perhaps one of the other ones. One of the others… oh of all the moments to fail to remember their names. Their titles.”

Alex ducked down and reached for the golden heart. His soft hand gingerly brushed against the ankle of the unconscious prisoner. Tears welled up in his eyes as a sudden shock of orgasmic pleasure exploded deep within Alex’ pants. He moaned aloud. Then clamped his fingers tightly around the golden heart.

“Alex!” Roderick heard his son’s voice and turned to see him bent over the prisoner, “Get out of there you foolish boy! Let the followers take the spirit’s cloth! Your job is to stay out of the way, child!”

“But father,” Alex wanted to explain but felt the warmth of the sticky shameful experience still clinging on his thighs. He stepped backwards, leaping over the runes, and made for the door.

“What is that thing?” John Hathaway asked aloud as the followers took the gossamer cloth away and found nothing else seemingly of value or usefulness on the prisoner’s prostrate form. Roderick Burgess motioned to the followers to allow the glass prison to be returned before motioning to the other followers to hand him the cloth.

“Perhaps a God. Perhaps something even Gods fear,” Roderick Burgess was not sure how he knew. Perhaps his long desire to be some magus was finally coming true. “Perhaps something we should have not summoned. Dreams? Destiny? Despair?”

John Hathaway shook his head and watched in silence as Roderick took the gossamer cloth from the follower’s hands and spread it over his two hands. Gently, like it were some ritualistic cloth, Roderick Burgess then lifted it to his face and breathed inwards. Hathaway saw Roderick Burgess suddenly tremble and fall backwards, nearly losing his balance fully. The magus ran one hand over his chest and stomach, then began to gasp and audibly moan in shocked pleasure.

”Roderick?”

“This… this.. is miraculous… this thing,” he muttered before rolling his eyes back and kissing the cloth fully like a lover would. John Hathaway shook his head in disgust as Roderick Burgess suddenly peered from beneath the cloth and stared back in an unexpected expression of rage. “GET OUT! ALL OF YOU! LEAVE THIS ROOM! I SHALL CALL FOR YOU WHEN I NEED OF YOU! LEAVE!” In a commotion, the followers made for the door. John Hathaway knew when he was not needed and took one last glance at the prisoner in the glass cage. He felt the beginnings of a problem were brewing and he wanted to nip it at the bud before it even began to grow. But when it came to affairs of magic and the occult, it was Roderick Burgess who knew how best to deal with such matters.

“OUT!”

Roderick Burgess began to physically shove John Hathaway out of the room, an act that was unprecedented by anything else the self-named Daemon King had ever done to his friend in the past. John feared some ill-spirit or some demon had possessed his friend. But for now, he realized to argue or fight against it was to tempt folly and destroy any chance of finding his friend help or a solution to the strange events that have transpired. John Hathaway left the room and promised himself to revisit his friend some other day. None noticed how Roderick Burgess stared at the cloth with the eyes of a lustful man overcome by desire. Or how Alex Burgess had quietly locked himself in a room.

No one save the prisoner of the glass prison whose eyes now opened with a sudden understanding of what had just transpired. And a sudden fear that perhaps… just perhaps… today Desire of the Endless had finally done something that Desire would regret for a very very long time.

- end of issue 2 -
Ultimate Desire
by Tobie Abad



Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe
Cathy delos Santos

I DID IT!
Yep. Wrote a Novel at last. My first one too.

Skydiving Without Parachutes

Read it now!




This novel is dedicated to my Panda Bear, Isha, my parents and to God, who makes all things possible.

SKYDIVING CONTINUES
Am nearly at the 40,000 point. I can't wait!
I do believe I can make it! I have to!

OFF TO THE CREATIVE REVIEW
Yep. Be back on Wednesday!

I MISS MY PANDA BEAR!!!!!!
But I know she loves me. I love her so much!

OPEN MEET ANOTHER SUCCESS
Baring strange weird requests, the Open Meet this November was a resounding success. My congratulations to Vic Cabazor for the success of the event. My Panda Bear Isha brought her younger brother, Basil with us to the event and I think he had fun naman too! Citadel was a majorly fun game, as was Once Upon a Time (Thank you Adrain for the tutorial and the toys!) Bas got to play Navia Drapt (did I get the name right?) and The Amaze-ing Labyrinth too. Lots of laughs, lots of fun, lots of new faces!

On a side note on the event, I must get something off my chest.
Two night have passed and I still feel very slighted by an event during the open meet: I was totally humiliated by a person who I had indirectly slighted when I took pictures of her and their group without asking permission during the Open Meet. Some how, she felt she had the right to mouth me off in public (in front of both my friends and new faces we've just met). Buti pa yung isang friend niya who very nicely asked me not to use the pictures; he was being sensitive towards me while informing me that I did something wrong. That I appreciated.

My actions were obviously innocent mistakes on my part simply because the open meet is a public event after all. People do not normally ask permission to take pictures when covering public events. There was no intention to attack or humiliate anyone.

She, on the other hand, could have at least informed me of her issues about the photographs in a more appropriate way.

But what the heck, I deleted the pictures just to get it over with.
Point of the matter: I apologised. I believe I deserve one in return for how I was approached.

But, the fact that the event ended with no one from that table bothering to apologise for my "public reprimanding" kind of shows what kind of sensitivity can be expected in this issue. I was really hoping to the very least that you would have realised or at least someone in your group would have realised how humiliated I felt after what you did. I guess that ain't happening.

Ultimately, I'm just dropping the matter and avoiding the said person (or possibly persons) just to keep from accidentally hitting more "eccentric" buttons.

Kung gawin pang issue ang pag-blog ko ng event, please naman... at least realise I still kept it anonymous. I have the right to rant and I'm not identifying the said person in public. But I do need to speak out on how humiliated her said actions made me feel. If ever this post reaches her attention, may she realised what she did and work to keep it from happening again. On my side, I would probably just take pictures of people I know.

My thanks though for the many others who actually privately approached me, and apologised that I had to go through that. I appreciated it.

REPLYING TO SOME QUERIES:
1) How did I get it?
I have no idea. Frankly, it was a surprise to me too. The doctor says it might be a pimple that got infected or something like that. Yeeech... Panda bear told me her dad once got it, but that's when a wound on his leg got in contact with flood water. I don't recall having my face do anything as drastic.

Or maybe it's karma. Hmm?

2) What are you taking for it?
Cloxacillin 500mg, one capsule every six hours for the next few days. And I hate how it makes me feel very drowsy if not tired. Also, I've noticed I feel the tendancy to suffer migraines more with it in my system.

3) How bad has it hit you?
Not that bad naman. Well, visibly, there isn't much to look at and be afraid of. So those other pictures of Cellulitis with engorged arms or frighteningly reddish peeling body parts aren't what I'm going through (so far, at least).

4) Is it contagious?
No it isn't. Thank God.

5) Does it hurt?
It does feel tender. Kind of like how a really sore pimple would feel. Or how a swollen toe that you just stubbed would feel... just make it constant (and in my case, on the face).

6) Are you posting a picture of it?
Are you really that curious to see it? Okay... will see if I can get my camera. If ever, you'll see it in this blog in time. (edit) Here you go. I took two pictures since in the one with a flash, it looks less noticable.

RPG article: Approaching Romance in RPGS
by Tobie Abad
March 6, 2001

Storyteller: She looks away from you, but you believe you caught a slight smile creeping on her face. Her hands seemed to tremble for a moment.

Player One: I slowly walk up to her, and reach for her hands and say-

Storyteller: She pulls away and shakes her head.
"No... no... this is wrong.. You can't.. You don't mean that..."

Player One: "But I do. I have loved you for so long that I always wondered if you ever noticed."

Storyteller: She finally looks at you and you see her eyes sparkle with joy. There is a smile on her face and although you find yourself realising wholly that she does feel the same way, there is a bitterness that you cannot ignore. "You cannot... you must not leave your wife."



Such scenes can be more dramatic than the way you have expected them to run... when mood is built around the scene very carefully.

As roleplaying gamers, we all know the importance of mood and mindset in creating an immersive game. But alas, it seems more common for gamers to shy away from portraying love-passion related scenes than expected. Even if there is a romantic element in the game, it seems rare that a player would actively pursue the romantic element with emotional depth and instead state things that have obviously been done time and time again in movies.

Lines such as:
a) I have always loved you
b) I love you with all my heart
c) I really love you
d) You have no idea how much I love you
and so on and on...

Want depth? Want to make the love scene more empathically romantic and dramatically immersive? Want to make the other players swoon and chide and even wish to have a romance as "wonderful" as the one in the game?

Here are some tips.
(oh, and though it may be tempting to use them in real life romances, be warned... the best real life romances are those that happen spontaneously)

1. Get over self-conscious worries
If you're too preoccupied about being mistaken as gay, or if you'll be laughed at, and so on and so forth... it will show and the scene can be tossed to the trash bin. You have to get your shyness out of the can and into the bin. That's why you're the Storyteller buddy!

For Players, well, you got yourself into this scene, so you better act it out well. Stop worrying about what the other players will think. Block them out and focus on the game. Transform your "performance worries" into "answer anxiety" as to worrying about how the paramour will take what you are about to say.

2. Don't try to be creative.
This is one of the times you should STOP "roleplaying" dialogue and start belting out emotional bullshit. Don't try to be creative unless you're really the type (or your character is) who is during a romantic moment in life. But it feels more real and has more depth if you portray it as naturally as possible.

3. Try to be creative.
Enough with the usual cliches. Try using wonderfully created lines of passion. Movies actually are ironically, a great source of better lines as well.

From the "You complete me" of Jerry Maguire, to the "I'm ending our friendship" kissing scene of With Honors, there are loads of wonderful things to use in a game to make the romantic element more interesting.

Just avoid using the ones from movies your co-players are too familiar with. Spoiling the illusion invites the worst enemy in a romantic scene: Laughter.

4. MUSIC
A storyteller device. Music can really help the players ride the emotion and dive deeper into love. Notice how all of us have certain songs that still remind us of past lovers, or previous relationships...

Try looking for instrumental music, to avoid the "sing along syndrome" many players have. Perhaps the score of "Il Postino" or a movie like "Great Expectations" can fit the bill. Keep in mind the main tip: Use SCORES

Players, though, can join the fun if they actually roleplay their changing the music as an element in the scene.

I had a player stop my CD player during a romatic scene, complain "You know, listening to all this classical crap isn't going to show you who you really love" and plugged in Ronan Keating's acoustic version of 'When You Say Nothing At All', and proposed.

That, I must admit, froze us all into silence and sighs.

5. THE BAD STUFF
Never forget, the most realistic romances are never perfect. Everything from "Not having enough time," (But the Technocracy must be stopped!) to merely having pets, (Darn dog senses I'm Cainite!) can add wonderful plot twists to relationships.

FOR RESEARCH:
Check out the following films for atypical relationships and twists to try adding to your game.

These are films that strangely, my players haven't seen. If yours have, well, try finding a few good ones. I'd love to hear your suggestions.
a. Pyromaniac's Love Story
b. Music From Another Room
c. As Good As It Gets
d. Some Kind of Wonderful
e. Goonies
f. Fifth Element

Keep on loving!




Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe
Cathy delos Santos

THE SICKNESS CONTINUES
First of all, sorry to my Panda bear. I always get more drowsy when I'm taking antibiotics. I do hope you got my text message stating I was turning in for the night. Woke up today at 4a.m. and only know did I realise I should have taken my next dose of meds that moment. So now I'm late in my second dose. Gah. I went back to sleep and now woke up at 8:20a.m. with a deep hunger for food before I take my next pill.

I'm suffering from a case of cellulitis, according to the company physician, which from what I've read is a scary thing. Hopefully I have a simpler more basic case. God, please.. I have no idea how I got it or what allowed the bacteria in. All I know is that I have a painful tender lump under my right eye and according to the doctor, I have to take a bunch of antibiotics.

End result: Feeling feverish at 8:00a.m. Going to have to stay in. And yes, work AT home while I nurse myself back to health.

Just my luck, eh?

Also, am terribly terribly late for my Nanowrimo posts. I might not make the cut. Gotta keep at it. Got to keep writing. I'm barely in the 20,000 mark and I've already found myself losing steam. It's not supposed to feel this hard to write, but I guess with everything that's hitting me at work and financially, I'm finding it hard to wiggle my muse up to the task.

Must survive.
Must write.
Must live.
Must love.

Thank you for being there for me, Isha. Without you, I'd probably be a dreadfully irritable mess. More so than I already am now.

NOT TOO HAPPY
First of all, they just blocked Blogger and my blogspot account at work. Damn them. Eto na nga ang replacement ko sa stress after quitting smoking, haharangan pa. Grr...

Then, my cellular phone credit is maxed out. Gah.

Then, an officemate who borrowed money ain't paying me back yet. Putcha. I need the money na. I lent it when it was needed. Sana naman they pay when its needed back.

Lastly, I feel like I'm in a slump as of the late. Like I want to shut everything out. Like I want to reboot my system. Maybe its stress. Maybe its no longer being happy at work. Its hard to tell. All I know is I feel like I need a good recharge.

ANOTHER KOMIKON PIC!
Jac Ting Lim shares with us another Komikon Pic of my Panda Bear Isha and Me! Love how the colors seem to have been planned!

Thank you for taking this pic, Jac!!! Also, thanks to Elbert and Camy for the comics!

Don't you just love Isha's smile?

Superheroes in Classical Art
Check it out!

One hour to go.. and they call for a meeting!
Yep. Friday night and am roaring to meet up with my Panda bear who has been so patiently waiting for me at UP when they suddenly tell me there's a meeting at six p.m. tonight?!?!? Gah, they better let me go by six thirty or I am definitely making a scene.

Gah.

New comics in my comic blog by the way. And I should be able to update skydiving by tonight if I actually get home before midnight! hheheh.

EARLY MORNING
Woke up at 5:30a.m. today. Egad. This is the second time I've done so. Guess my body clock is on the reset. My apologies to everyone who tried to reach me last night and failed to. I wasn't even expecting to be asleep that early but I guess my body is demanding I catch up on rest, eh?

Excited for the dinner am attending with my Panda Bear Isha tonight. We're attending John Yang's birthday celebration in Katipunan. Might not be able to stay that long though.

My Open Meet Offerings:
This coming Open Meet I will be running two roleplaying game demos. Hope you fnd them interesting!

INQUISITORS
Game System: White Wolf Gaming Studio Storyteller System - Vampire: The Dark Ages line
Overview and Setting: Players portray a group of Inquisitors who investigate on a possible heretic group active in the mountains of Languedoc. Characters are faithful seekers of truth who discover that there are things that might not be what they expect in a world lit by fire.
Style: Action, Decisive decision-making and dramatic debate on the nature of Good and Evil
Similarities: A cross between Joan of Arc: The Messenger, Millenium and the Exorcist rolled into one.

HEROES
Game System: DC Heroes (MEGS system)
Overview and Setting: Players take the roles of members of a group of ordinary people who discover an incredible plot by the evil Despero and must act to buy the Justice League time to arrive at the scene.
Style: Quirky-humor, Action and lots of Heroic attempts
Similarities: Zoolander and Mystery Men meets Justice League of America.

Knowledge of the game systems are not necessary to enjoy the games.
Passing knowledge of the subject matters are required (ex. Who is Superman? What is Sin?)

See you guys there!

BRAIN SHUTTING DOWN
Finally home.
After 36 hours of being awake.
It is time to sleep.

I miss my Panda.
She's out with some older guy watching Harry Potter.
Wah. I wish she was here instead, taking care of over-worked me.

See you tomorrow, folks!

NEXT FOUR PAGES ONLINE!
Yep, my Pinoy Martial Arts 24-Hour Comic is slowly being released for public consumption. I wonder if everyone out there can view it properly though. Here at work (yes I haven't gone home) I can't seem to view particular pages. They appear instead as broken links. So I tried re-uploading all them pages and fixing the links, but they still appear as broken links for me. I don't know if its one of them office net quirks. So if you guys and gals out there find any problems, do tell me so I know whether its a localized thing or not.

See my comics at

GAWD... STILL WORKING

Hitting my 21st hour of non-stop work now. Just so much to do. And yes, its the dreaded TV Guide week too. Oh well, at least I got to have lunch yesterday with my Panda Bear. I miss her already. I've been missing her since last night. I do hope she had good dreams.

AD CONGRESS

A bunch of my friends including Joey and John-boy are off to the Ad Congress at Cebu. Wah. Wish I was going too. Sadly, I'm stuck here. Could have been worse I guess. Yah. Could have. Been. Lent John-boy my digital camera so he can take pictures of the events and chicks and stuff. Pornographer with a calling card, yah. Ayuh.

HARRY POT POT

My Panda Bear is watching the Harry Potter movie today. Am not in any mental state to join her, sadly, so I do hope she has fun with the friend she is going with. Ah. Crap.
Viktor Krum indeed. Hahahaha. Flippendo his face if he tries anything. Hehehe!

Damn, I need sleep. Later!

SLINGING INK: Foul

The sky was falling but no one even cared.

The young little critter stared as the black void loomed from above. It was larger now, wih jagged teeth-like edges that reminded him of how a Great White Shark would smile. He watched as the clouds evaded the dark window, as if they were scared they would be swallowed by the inky blackness that lingered and waited in silence.

"The sky is falling! The sky is falling!"

The little chicken tried screaming at the top of his lungs in the past. He tried running around, warning anyone who would listen that such a huge looming threat hung over them. But no one cared. Not a single soul gave a damn anymore. Not with Mr. Farmer now visiting the coop nightly, to take one of the other women quietly from the Rooster's care. None of the women returned. None of the women would know what to do.

"The sky is falling!"

But the pigs merely wallowed in their mud pit, ignoring the young animal's declarations. The pigs were too preoccupied with the loss of their cousin Ned and their Father Jeff. Both were lured away a few nights ago by Mr. Farmer's eldest son. Neither have ever returned. The pigs, however, recalled how their last lunch had a distinct flavor that reminded them of their relatives for some reason.

But why ponder too much on things, eh? Wallow. Wallow in the mud.





Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe
Cathy delos Santos

24-Hour Comic: Pinoy Martial Arts



Created as an attempt to participate in spirit with the self-proclaimed 1st Philippine 24-Hour Comic Book Challenge (Which is kind of strange since at least two people, Elbert and I, have made one before...) since I was not able to go with them to Puerto Galera but I wanted to take part in it nontheless. Check out Elbert's blog for the works by others who were able to attend.

If you want to see the one I made, you can read them here! (Well, at least the first four pages for now.)

Check it out!


Now have a new blog dedicated to my one shots, short minis and teasers for comics.
G-komics, the Garapata Komikero comic books!

And as before, all is still free.

AEGIS November Open Meet

DOWN WITH THE SICKNESS
Yep. One of those day. Was unable to get up at all today except for moments in between lucidity to answer my cellular phone. I sent a message to Joey about being unable to go to work today, but since I never got a reply, am afraid I might have sent an incoherent one... or never got to press the SEND option. Egad. I hope she simply was too busy to reply. Now, its 6:00p.m. and I finally feel better enough to stand up and walk around. Haven't eaten a single thing. Starving but still okay. Feeling the chills still there. At least the fever broke for now. Hoping I don't get a relapse.

BELATED GREETINGS!
Also, it was very recently Sophie's birthday! Hope you had a wonderful party Sophie! Wish I could be there to celebrate it with you! I miss you so much!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU from all of us back here in Manila! May you have many more birthdays to come!

Strange test I took as requested by a friend

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

THE EVIL EYE LIVES
Panda Bear Isha and I went out for dinner one night and found ourselves in the rare company of Evil Eye himself. With a quick bite to eat at Tokyo, Tokyo, we then headed to some secret spot Evil Eye knew of where we had the most delicious cake called Death by Chocolate. Then, from there, we bid the Evil Eye goodbye to then made our way to walk off the extra weight we gathered. Later in the evening, we met up with Maui who had witnessed some of the shoot-out events that occured in Emerald avenue. Spooky. At least buti naman he was unharmed.



All in all, a good evening!

UPDATE on activities
KTV
Went KTV a few days ago with Joey and Choi. Kinda had a stressful day and needed to lay back. Also in a way celebrated Choi's joining ABS-CBN Global Limited as a Coordinator. Here's hoping he lasts long in the job. Work at Global can be terribly terribly taxing, if you're not ready for it.




Big Brother Bob
Also, got a picture with Big Brother Bob when he passed by our office. Gah. Yes, I am a fan. I admit it! I admit it! Heheheh.. It was a shock to learn how tall he was. Minsan lang talaga ako matalo ng tao when it comes to height.

Frustrations

I've always known myself to have moments of being bull-headed and easily frustrated. People who know the real me know how much I devote my time, effort and attention to those whom I care about and how I have unwritten and unspoken expectations to be respected and treated as a person. So it can be funny at times to realise how I still allow myself to be surrounded at times by people who just frustrate me.

Being stuck at work til ten, and not being able to move forward in a project due to delays caused by other people, I decided to creatively spent this time exorcising the very said frustrations onto my blog. Sort of a cathartic exhale so to speak. Listed here are various entities who have in one way or another, added to the frustrations of today.

Kaya kung may tamaan diyan, please, realise that if I have not brought it up to you, its probably because I don't want to rock the boat (or most likely it is because I don't talk to you.. wait, why are you reading this blog then?). But if you do think it applies to you, maybe you should just take it as a hint to look at yourself and change a few things that aren't helping anyone anyway.

Alpha
Alpha cares first and formost for himself above everyone else. Which if you think about it is actually healthy if it is done in a way that does not use or abuse others. Sadly, that is not the case. Alpha takes what he wants and ravages others for what he needs, then claims deep seated psychological issues as the reasons he does what he does. Pity the kind and loving ones who still support him and treat him with civility, for Alpha will never notice or care.

Beta
Beta on the other hand treats the world as a stupid children's show where nothing emotionally destructive should have any basis. Where any tears shed or wounds from another's actions are ignored unless they are his own. Beta loves finding ways to remind you of how nothing should matter and why being sensitive to another's emotions is not part of being mature.

Charlie
Charlie is a creative force. Charlie chruns and gives birth so often, it is truly something to admire. But Charlie has a tendancy to choose too selectively whom does and doesn't matter. And sadly, his choices can cause many others to feel like they don't reach some unspoken standard Charlie demands, which makes it difficult at times to feel like his friend. Most likely, however, such a tendancy is unconscious and unintended.

Delta
Delta strove into the world and suddenly realised that there were many many things he did not want in it. So Delta commands they should be changed and expects them to change. But don't make the mistake of thinking Delta will help change things. Delta just wants the world to become what he wants before he enters it.

Echo
Echo lives in his own time. Deadlines and promised target dates are ignored unless they are things that will affect Echo's personal time and comfort. Echo has a strange self-deluded belief that he is doing everything the way they should be done, which tends to mean doing things in a way that take four times the length of time than normal.

Foxtrot
Foxtrot is in a mess. Foxtrot cannot seem to realise that others aren't too happy to see him. Though Foxtrot tries to be better, most of the time, Foxtrot makes inane comments that others feel the need to move away. Still, Foxtrot tries and tries regardless.

Golf
Golf never listens. Trust me, I've tried to say things in so many ways, but Golf never listens. All you can do is just ride the waves and hope you don't drown.

Hotel
Hotel confuses me. Hotel can be very confusing because Hotel is rarely consistent. And add the fact that Hotel can be horrifically forgetful, one can imagine how hard it can be to do anything with Hotel.

India
India spends so much each night, he expects others to help. And when they do, he keeps long lines of i-owe-yous that he tends to forget to cover, unless you remind him.

Juliet
Juliet just loves to destroy my name. I don't contact him anymore or even make any attempts to reach him and yet any time I meet someone who knows him, I learn Juliet still tells them and others whom I have not even met yet that I am someone whom "getting to know might not be in your best interests." Talk about intense. Juliet also claims I have not let go. Hmmm?

Kilo
Kilo does not realise how much I want to teach him a lesson. He does things which really irk me and even crosses certain lines I rather he didn't, but I know I have no right to demand or tell him anything so I just ignore it when I should. Kilo's a nice guy and all but he really needs to be taught a lesson.

There... I already feel much better. Funny, looking back at the list, I see the pattern of me just being too much a damned martyr to talk to these people fac-to-face about these issues. Well, not really, considering for a number of them I've already done that, and still came out the "bad guy" in their perspective. Evidently, I did stick to the male pronoun to keep things... concealed.

But I guess that's how the world works.

And no, I will NEVER reveal who these people are. Why? Because I do not need to rock the boat. Because I am happy and content where I am. And because there is never such a thing as a perfect friendship. Never. But there is such a thing as being a sensitive friend.

Sensitive, of course, in the sense that you be more empathetic to the other.


Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe
Cathy delos Santos

Delayed Slinging Ink Post:
Yep, I totally forgot to post one last week. So here's the post for that missed day.
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Clues You're a Better Storyteller
by tobie abad (http://surf.to/tobie)


One of the most common (and yet unspoken) Storyteller problems is the eternal question asked by every person who has been in a relationship that didn't work out; "Am I good enough?"

Our performance as the man behind the scenes, as every person in the world who isnt a player character, as every cloud, wind and raindrop that exists is something we would love to hear feedback from. And many of us DO ask; ready to hear whatever the players might say.

But for those few who wouldn't want to ask, here are some clues to watch/look for that would hint that you are a storyteller who has given remarkable games.

1.) Players Beg For More
Storyteller: And with one triumphant cry, you all raise your swords and welcome the new King of Dreams. The end.

Players: Cool... Wow... That was different...

Storytellers: Thanks.

Players: So what do we play next? Yeah? I got my vampire ready. Can we start now?

Sometimes a Storyteller can be too dense to realise that the first sign they are doing a good job is the fact that the Players ask for more. It is a pity, since many storytellers confuse "asking for more" with "not content with the game".

Wouldn't you want to start watching a film by a director who just showed you a film that blew you away?

2) Players inquire before the game starts
Player: Listen I was thinking I wanted my Brujah to start dating. Is that okay for the plot?

Storyteller: Of course, you all carry your own stories.

Player: Cool... uh, can you add a romantic element?

When you notice players actually approaching you prior to the game's session and setting little trinkets of information with you, then its a clue that they are enjoying the game so much that they want to add a few personal touches to it. Everybody who sees something really nice wants to be a part of it. Keep that in mind.

Some storytellers make the mistake of seeing this as players "covering up for what the storyteller's game lacked." It is possible, but the point that the player is making such an effort to make the game a better experience instead of just looking for a new storyteller, is a good sign. They want to "keep" you.

3) Reruns never end
Me and my friends were having coffee in a small cafe one late evening when one of them started laughing. As we turned to ask him what was up, he merely blurted out, "Slave of god!" The whole group broke into laughter as we recalled that Marco, a friend of mine, had a Salubri whom we kept teasing as such.

Turns out, he recalled some parts of the Dark Ages game we had nearly a year ago. And until now, we recall the game's scenes pretty well.

When you're friends start referring to the game like some television series they saw a few months back... or when you're buddies start talking about the game as if they were the "old times" then realise that those games had the approaches that your gaming group appreciated. Its a good clue to what gaming style they prefer.

4) Players Listen
Its not the player's turn and yet they stay in the room, sitting around the table and listen intently? Mention its a party scene, and they start mumbling ambient dialogue to make the scene better?

You got players who love the game so much that they'd want to be in every gaming second. Congratulations!

5) Even Others Listen
You are playing a game with four people, and look up to realise the room has ten people in it. 5 Others had come in just to listen and watch you people play. To make matters even more interesting, someone tells you "even just listening you guys game is like watching a movie. heck , i even forget i'm not watching a movie."

This is probably one of the rarest signs you can find, but it is one of the best to receive. When I was told that very quote, I found myself weak-kneed and smiling, realising that I have entertained both my players and people who could have spent the last few hours doing something else they wanted to do. I still forget that listening and watching my games is already something they WANT to do.

6) And Even More Ask to Listen
You get invited to share ideas, tips or lessons.

This is probably the ULTIMATE sign that you're a good Storyteller.


So, if any of these 6 signs do show, then smile knowing that you are a storyteller who is appreciated and talented. Be proud in knowing that you make the grade in the fine art of being a god-jury-innocent-atmospheric-evil-situational being.

Congratulations!



Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe
Cathy delos Santos

NaNoWriMo begins!
And inspired by my Panda Bear, Isha, and a lot of the hilarious, painful, strange, disturbing and humorous moments in my life, I've decided to try and write a fictional novel using them as inspiration...

Skydiving Without Parachutes

For those who don't know, NaNoWriMo is National Novel Writing Month where participants try to write a 50,000 word novel in one month. This is my second year to try doing this. Last year, I only hit a certain point before giving up (To Covet only reached 4,000 words!) so this year I decided to try doing something closer to my heart. Still, know that Skydiving Without Parachutes is a work of fiction and though I will use many things based from my real life experiences, ultimately the novel is a novel about love and not about me or anyone else in particular.

Here's hoping I succeed!
And yes, this novel is dedicated to my Panda Bear, my parents and to God, who makes all things possible.